The dream that doesn't come true

left with fuzzy photographs and fading memories.

To back track two weeks or even a month

meeting bliss with the touch of your tongue

Now I hear silence, words unsung.

The Full Buck Moon

Tonight is the Full Buck Moon.

Going on day 5 of no power I welcome the extra light at night.

Full moon equals less candle usage.

Excited to start seeing antlers growing!

Day 4

No power. No lights, running water, or AC in 100 degree temps.

The dogs and I are hanging in there, the chickens are fine, and the poor pigs have dirty water. Tonight ill haul up buckets full of fresh water from the stream. There's just one giant hill between the barn and stream. I'll be going uphill with the full buckets. I'm sweating thinking about it.

The pork defrosting in my freezer is now safely very frozen at a friends. 

Now to put ice I luckily grabbed while 7-11 was restocking out for the pigs, that'll tide them over and cool them down.

Heat WAVE

100 degrees, feels like 110.

went home over lunch and sprayed down a portion of the pig pen where they have rooted in the cool dirt.

pigs need access to shade due to their light skin color, else they burn.

they also need ample space to wallow to keep cool as pigs don't sweat like people do.

fresh cool water is a must.

keep water in the shade.

oy, i think its time for a piglet baby pool.

Pee by candlelight

Dance in the shadows

randoms

a windy summer day

clothes on the line flap like flags in the wind.

my hair whisps in every direction.

the humidity is gone, the breeze is alive and well.

today is a beautiful day!

i'm looking forward to the following...

1. quick run to tractor supply to grab a bale of straw (to be stuffed in the trunk of the corolla) and a bag of pig feed (which will sit like a passed out sack of potatoes in the front seat of the car).

2.  let dogs out...check up on chickens. 
3. give hens fresh cold water.
4. PIGLETS PIGLETS PIGLETS!!!!

i'll let the piglets out in the field to run, play and root...what a site this will be.

its been awhile since i've had younger pigs and i'm excited to have these two at home.

hello evenings outside with the pigs, oh how i've missed you.

Book Giveaway Attempt 2

Any takers?

Please.

Anyone?

i'm gilty

i brought home 2 gilts yesterday evening.

impulsive

on the fly

...and thrilled!

a farmer friend purchased 15...for his first experience with hogs.  he has the time and space and a friend who begged to purchase a pair.  i picked these two and without hesitation picked their squealing screaming bodies by their back legs and put them in their hay filled crate to be driven home.

the girls seemed pleased with their new home and i'm excited to completely strip the straw bedding from the previous pigs (its a bit dusty in there) and fill it with new straw for these two. 

so thrilled to be back in the pig game!

Please Donate!!!

No no no, not to fund my out of control lifestyle, but to help stop the dog food trade in Asia.

The Soi Dog Foundation helps rescue, rehab, and adopt dogs who would otherwise be sold for me.

The condition of these animals is horrid.  Learn more here:

http://www.soidog.org/en/you-can-help-stop-the-dog-meat-trade/

the dogs

Cali - 7.5 year old pit bull mix

Sadie - 9+? year old terrier/hound mix

Brice - senior rat terrier and Littles adult chihuahua...the boys.

TEMPLE GRANDIN

Every farmer should be familiar with the name, research, and practices of this amazing woman.  Temple Grandin is an amazing scientist who uses her experiences with autism to reduce the stress, anxiety, pain, and fear in livestock transport and slaughter.

My pigs benefited greatly from what I learned from Ms Grandin.

The butcher I had my pigs processed at takes their staff on trips to her seminars and practice her methods.  There's nothing like shaking the hand of the gentlemen who killed and processed your meat.









the depressed farmer

Farming isn't easy when you have atypical depression.

For those unfamiliar with this type of depression I have linked and copied some information provided by the Mayo Clinic.

Atypical Depression
By Mayo Clinic staffDefinition

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/atypical-depression/DS01181


As with any type of depression, atypical depression can make you feel blue and keep you from enjoying life. When you have atypical depression, a particular pattern of signs and symptoms tends to occur. You may feel hungry and gain weight. You may sleep a lot, and your arms and legs may feel heavy. Many people who have atypical depression have a hard time maintaining relationships and are especially afraid of rejection by others.
Atypical depression often starts in the teenage years and is more common in women than in men. Despite the name, atypical depression isn't uncommon or unusual. As with other forms of depression, treatment for atypical depression includes medications, psychological counseling (psychotherapy) and lifestyle changes.

Symptoms

Depression of any kind can cause:
Feelings of sadness, emptiness or feeling tearful
Loss of interest or pleasure in normal activities
In addition to standard symptoms of depression, atypical depression symptoms also include:
Increased appetite
Unintentional weight gain
Increased desire to sleep
Heavy, leaden feeling in the arms and legs (leaden paralysis)
Sensitivity to rejection or criticism that interferes with your social life or job
Relationship conflicts
Trouble maintaining long-lasting relationships
Fear of rejection that leads to avoiding relationships
Having depression that temporarily lifts with good news or positive events but returns later


It's not known exactly what causes atypical depression. As with other types of depression, a combination of factors may be involved. These include:

Brain chemistry.
Neurotransmitters are naturally occurring brain chemicals that are thought to play a direct role in depression. When these chemicals are out of balance, it may lead to depression symptoms.
Inherited traits. Depression is more common in people whose biological family members also have the condition.
Life events. Events such as the death or loss of a loved one, financial problems and high stress can trigger depression in some people.
Early childhood trauma. Traumatic events during childhood, such as abuse or loss of a parent, may cause permanent changes in the brain that make you more susceptible to depression
Diagnostic criteria for atypical depression

To be diagnosed with atypical depression, you must meet the symptom criteria spelled out in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). This manual is published by the American Psychiatric Association and is used by mental health providers to diagnose mental conditions and by insurance companies to reimburse for treatment.
For a diagnosis of atypical depression, you must first meet the general DSM criteria for major depression — which includes feeling down and losing interest in things you once enjoyed. You'll also need to meet other, specific criteria for atypical depression.
For a diagnosis of atypical depression you must have this symptom:
Being cheered up by positive events
In addition, you must have at least two of these symptoms for diagnosis:
Gaining weight gain or having a noticeable increase in appetite
Sleeping excessively
Being sensitive to rejection by others
Having a heavy feeling in the arms and legs


Treatments and drugs

Treatment for atypical depression is generally the same as treatment for other types of depression. Medications and psychological counseling (psychotherapy) are effective for most people.
In some cases, a primary care doctor can prescribe medications to relieve depression symptoms. However, many people need to see a doctor who specializes in diagnosing and treating mental health conditions (psychiatrist). Most people with atypical depression also benefit from seeing a psychologist or other mental health counselor. Usually the most effective treatment for depression is a combination of medication and psychotherapy.
Atypical depression most often occurs along with mild, long-lasting depression. However, it can cause more severe symptoms in some people, such as feeling suicidal or not being able to do basic day-to-day activities. If you have severe depression, a doctor, loved one or guardian may need to guide your care until you're well enough to participate in decision making. You may need a hospital stay, or you may need to participate in an outpatient treatment program until your symptoms improve.

carrying capacity

I view the term carrying capacity in two parts.  Financial.  Ecological.

1. Financial
How many animals and plants can I afford to care for?

2. Ecological
How many plants and animals can my farm support while maintaining integrity of the land?

It amazes me how some farmers stuff animals in every nook and cranny of their farm with no regard for how they are impacting the local water quality (agricultural runoff), soil quality (erosion), or happiness of said animal.

Happy and healthy pigs aren't found in a stall.  Happy and healthy goats are not found in a small pen.  Animals NEED the opportunity to forage, graze, or root.  Their natural instincts must take priority.

Garden notTour

My garden has grown so much in the past few days the previous pictures I have feel too dated to share.  Today I will take more pictures and provide a new tour de garden.

While I LOVE maintaining my garden, the one aspect I fail at on a yearly basis is labeling my rows.  Each spring I vow to label and date my rows with what i've planted and each spring I fail to do so. 

How do you keep your gardens organized?  How do you label your plants?  Do you note the dates you plant? 

Book Giveaway #2!

Take advantage of the chance to win Jon Katz's Izzy & Lenore!

A book I haven't read nor will read.

Tell me how your dog (or cat!) helps around the farm and i'll pick a random winner. 

Garden Tour

Garden 2012

Mid June

My first garden 3 summers ago didn't have a fence, the following summer I used t-posts and galvanized fencing...spring forward to 2012 and I went all out.  Landscape timbers, galvanized fencing...and drum roll please...LIGHTS!  A friends garden was lit last year and i was might envious so this year I asked him if I could borrow a strand of shop lights.  The lights are 100ft long with bulbs/cages every 10 ft.  This amount of light allows for night time weeding and general garden work.

A friend, Bryant, and my bf helped dig the fence posts.  After my bf returned to NC I was able to get Bryant back to help put the posts in.  I manned the concrete and he made sure the posts were straight and plum.  Levels are your friend!  After all the posts were in we wrapped the fencing around and used a staple gun to secure the wire to the posts.  My friend Dennis graciously brought these lights over and staple gunned them to the top of the landscape timber.  I am 16ft shy of fencing and have temporary fencing around this area. 

The fence for me is not to keep deer, rabbits, or the all mighty bear cub sized groundhog out, but to keep little Sadie out of my garden.  My dogs ruin a garden quicker than any critter will.

All the beds were created from old fence posts when my parents replaced their fencing.  It has worked perfectly!

Back to the tour...

Bed 1 - Beets

This area doesn't get much sun so I haven't filled the spaces with other veggies.  This is the sacrifice bed.

Bed 2 - Carrots

I have been VERY pleased with how well my carrots are coming up.

The fence boards allow me to work, weed, plant, and harvest veggies without stepping on the soil.

It is very important to prevent the soil from compacting.

All beds are heavily mulched to prevent weeds and encourage water retention.

 Bed 3 - Lettuce

My mother has been coming over daily to pick lettuce, she claims its like eating candy.

Bed 4 - Green, yellow, and purple beans

in the empty space i recently planted more carrots.

.......to be continued

work

being at work makes me feel physically ill.

i want to garden.

Obedience Seminar

Ditched RuBiTube for a seminar held by TriCity Schutzhund with Cindy Peterson.

Phones about to die, more later!

Profound

" its not their death that's the problem its their life."

On farming livestock.

Selu

My boyfriend is part Cherokee and I'm trying to track down native plant species to grow in my garden in a plot dedicated to him.  Interesting article.  I appreciate how Selu is the name for corn and also the name of the First Woman in creation stories.  No Eve here.

Cherokee Agriculture

The beginning of Cherokee culture is identified with the cultivation of corn by the native people in the Southern Appalachians more than a thousand years ago.

Selu

From the earliest times in Cherokee history, the raising of corn was interwoven with the spiritual beliefs of the people. Indeed, the Cherokee name for corn—"selu"—is also the name of the First Woman in Cherokee creation stories.

Cherokee villages were surrounded by vast cornfields while gardens were planted beside rivers and streams. In addition to corn, the Cherokee grew beans, squash, sunflowers, pumpkins, and other crops. Cherokee women were the primary farmers.

After European Contact

After the arrival of Europeans, the Cherokee began growing peaches and watermelons acquired through trade. Cherokees began keeping and breeding horses circa 1720, and by the mid-1700s they were growing apples from Europe, black-eyed peas from Africa, and sweet potatoes from the Caribbean. Eventually, cattle were included among Cherokee livestock.
By the 1820s, due to the influence of the encroaching European immigrant culture, many Cherokee abandoned their traditional towns and were living in family groups in log cabins along streams and river valleys. Even though the land was still owned communally, the Cherokee practiced a type of subsistence agriculture on small farms usually ranging in size from two to ten acres.

http://www.blueridgeheritage.com/heritage/agriculture/cherokee-agriculture

An egg

After dark some evenings are meant to be as follows:

1.egg
2. book
3. bed

For many warm milk is the pre bed ritual, for this gal its a warm egg.  Animals are locked up. Dogs have been fed after a romp in the field, drink in the stream, and a sun fall watching me garden. Me time follows and dinner consists of an egg. One delicious hen deposited in my back yard egg. Oh...and sausage. Runt meat from the bravest runt I've ever known. Thank you. he

are farmers stupid?

i was speaking to the director at work today and mentioned pig farming was my calling.  he said, "oh, no...you are might too bright for that."

what does that mean?

are farmers supid?

while pig farming might not be as intellectually challenging as other occupations, it would be difficult.  farming is an endless road of education marked with success, failures and lessons learned.  the emotional and physical rewards as well as the learning process would make it more than worth it to me.

some people aren't cut out or intended to work in offices.  i'm one of them.

i admire those who can, in part because they mean i don't have to.  this world would not turn without those willing to sit at a desk infront of a computer all day.  their norm is torture to me.

i love mundane.  weeding, stalls, mulching.  mindless work under the sun, stars, or even rain or snow is greatly rewarding to me.

i don't want to learn visual basic, oracle, or python script.

give me a black snake to move, a barn to sweep, and a garden to keep.

Book give away!

Be the first to comment on your favorite garden tool (mines mulch) and you'll receive a copy of Chick Days and Made from Scratch, both by Jenna Woginrich. I'm cleaning out the library.

53rd Hunt Country Stable Tour

The Hunt Country Stable Tour 2011

The Upperville, Middleburg and Delaplane area is home to many of the country’s premier Thoroughbred breeding farms, show hunter barns, fox hunting barns, and country estates. On this remarkable weekend in May, owners open the doors of their exquisite ground, magnificent stables and extensive training facilities to visitors. Just a 45 mile drive from downtown Washington, D.C., comes spend a day or two touring by car with your friends and family. The tour offers visitors an opportunity to drive down winding country lanes amidst spectacular scenery in the heart of the nation’s horse capital.

All within a 15 minute drive from home. Some farms a frequent several times a week to visit friends.

Rock Hill was by far my favorite...sorry Trappe Hill Farm ;)

I watched dressage demos, horses swimming in the pond I fish in, and topped it off with a polo exhibition. As docile, planned, and routine as dressage is polo is feral, unpredictable, and explosive. Talent, skill, speed, coordination, and balance come together on the back of polo ponies. It's like croque on horseback. Impressive and wildly entertaining to watch. Sorry dressage, polo stole the show!

Cold Antler Farm

Where healthy animals go to die.

While I appreciate all the private emails concerning my comments on Ms Woginrich's blog, they may be better served sent to her personally. Perhaps your voice or words will prevent another animals untimely death. A Shepherds purpose is to protect their flock, by day by night. There is something concerning about seemingly healthy animals dropping like flies.

Be brave and send your comments directly to her. Validating my comments will not help your concerns about her animal husbandry or farming practices.

Pride comith before the fall and unfortunately het methods are failing and her animals are falling.

Rest in peace lambs, kits, chicks, poults, pigs and various others who met their untimely death after confined or unprotected life at Cold Antler Farm.

"Old farmers wisdom, count. Every morning every night. No excuses. Have you limited their grazing to avoid more injury and death? What a waste. Why do you bury good meat?"

1. Old farmers wisdom, count. Every morning every night. No excuses.

Good advise should not be discounted due to the source, humble up and keep track of your sheep. If distractions prevent you from appropriately tending to your flock, limit them. Animals first. Camp cold antler second.

2. Have you limited their grazing to avoid more injury and death?

If you know brambles (berries, yum!) Caused the animal to become stuck, why expose the rest of the flock? Cut brambles back or limit exposure...and for gods sake, keep jasper away from a down sheep. Sick? When and why did this animal become sick? Why did the lamb die? Not normal. Causes need to be found.

3. Why do you bury good meat?

An animal down is not going to produce "vile" meat, especially for dogs. If you can butcher a chicken one can try their lot at a sheep. Who would butcher it? Where I live, probably a dozen thrifty people within 6 miles of my house. They'd be out in 5 minutes for free meat.

4. What a waste.

What a waste.

Eyes bluer than

a bud light can.

country lyrics 101

Recycling?

How do you keep up on recycling?

Best storage techniques?

Do you have to take your recycling to a center or is it picked up?

grow grow grow

Barns and Beans

typical pit

the largest barred owl i've seen on my property, exciting!



confusion

goats - browsers - kept in pens
pigs - foragers - kept in a stall
rabbits - grazers - kept in cages

how is this providing the best care for ones animals?

how is this mimicing their natural diets and behaviors?

humerous read

sometime ago there was a post on a popular blog about Williams-Sonomas agricultural products.
i felt the author lifted an eyebrow, rolled an eye, and got on her high horse.

here is a humerous look at the same products, but with a like minded perspective.

i am especially partial to this paragraph, which i feel runs rampant in the me me me, i want want want culture that is my peer group.  hobbies, trades, and interests involving animals aren't for the uninformed romantics among us.  the romantic fails (while giving it their "best" which involved limited research, no mentor, and a proud ego) and the animals die.  call it a learning experience to make yourself feel better or call it a mistake and do better.  pride vs humble nature.

"My one concern, having demonstrated first hand that ill-trained hobbyists can neglect their bees to death, is whether kits like these encourage folks with an overly romantic notion of beekeeping to take it up before they are ready. But then, who am I to judge?"



http://www.treehugger.com/lawn-garden/1300-chicken-coop-williams-sonoma-goes-agrarian.html

Haven on Earth

badassery

dog trainer and drinks

snout art

hearts and livers

pictures

 VA Tech/Asheville Trip May 2012

Watch youngest brother graduate from VT and become an Army Officer

AND

visit chef john for some much needed face time.

Thank you to a great ex who watched 3 of my dogs while i was away. 

Littles and I rented a vehicle and hit the road.

• 5/11/2012 Depart Bluemont, VA @ 9:30pm
• 5/12/2012 Arrive in Waynesville, NC @ 4:30am
• Depart Waynesville, NC for Blacksburg, VA @ 10:00am
• Depart Blacksburg, VA for Waynesville, NC @ 8:00pm
• 5/13/2012 Arrive in Waynesville @ 4:00 am (thank you Blue Ridge Parkway)
• 5/14/2012 Depart Waynesville, NC @ 4:00pm
• 5/15/2012 Arrive in Bluemont, VA @ 12:02am

Driving to VT

 John takes the wheel, Littles takes a lap



 

View from Hurricane Creek

Clyde(ish), NC



A freezer full

i will later post an indepth account of my field trip to the slaughterhouse. 

for now, i have a freezer full of 100+ lbs of chops, sausage, bacon, brats, picnic roast, and ribs.  the tenderloin was left with john in NC last weekend during my trip to asheville/VA Tech.  figured he'd do them justice, i'd set the smoke detector off. 

blue ridge meats purchased my two large males and sold out of pork products within 2 weeks.  for a remote, rural, small scale facility in front royal, that says something.  the owner said this was the best pork she's ever seen.  in fact, she's offered to pay me to raise pigs for them IF i can find the breeder where i got my original 3.  i'm not sure i want to have pigs over the summer as my focus is on the garden, and possibly a few turkeys.  what i truly need to focus on is a well built chicken tractor.  my mother who lives 10 minutes down the road has enjoyed coming over and caring for the chickens...this means they free range from the time she leaves until i come home.  DANGEROUS.  i live in fox country.  must have chicken tractor!

the garden is filling up slowly.  this year i pulled the t-posts and put in fence posts.  shop lights are strung around 3 of the sides.  i shall now garden under the cover of darkness!  all my seeds have been planted not under the sun, but under the stars.

Pig heads

John is half way through the 8 hour drive from asheville nc to bluemont va. Tomorrow we will go to Blue Ridge Meats to pick up 3 pig heads. Dating an experienced chef has its perks, and makes utilitizing all edible portions of a pig much easier.
I planned the trip on slaughter day so john and I can witness several pigs being killed. This is important for me to see and my only regret with my experience raising pigs was not being there when they were killed.
Tomorrow will be an interesting, educational, and emotional day. For now though, my eyes are on the clock waiting for John. He's been gone for almost a month. Excited doesn't come close to describe how glad I will be to see him, if only for 2 days.

Plaid and polka

A fine pair

A pond

a lab and my girls.

...and white vehicles.

if you're going to do it

do it right.

an email from the slaughterhouse/butcher, a husband and wife team that only processes a handful of animals a week and practices the teachings of Temple Grandin. 

"Just wanted to let you know that we would love to have the larger pig.  The reasoning for our choice is that we have so many orders, we need the extra meat.  I would love to take the 2nd pig, as well, if you could take payment within 30 days, unless you have another buyer and I completely understand.   I will barter out the first larger pig towards your processing and whatever else we would owe, I would pay you the difference when you pick up.  Thanks for the opportunity to buy them, and just so you know you did a great job, and my staff was very impressed."

The two largest pigs will be sold to Blue Ridge Meats and I will keep the smaller female to disperse to family and friends, keep a bit for myself, and repay debts such as borrowing the trailer to take them to slaughter and my friends time trailering us there.

I feel the quality of the meat has 3 contributing factors. 

1. Genetics.  These were good looking and conformationally sound pigs.

2. Environment.  My pigs enjoyed access to a stall that opened to a large pen.  There was room to run, sun bathe, and wallow. The door to the stall was always left open. They had access to food and fresh water at all times.  In the evenings I would open their pen door to allow them to free range, root, and play in a large grassy field.  For the last 3 days they have 24/7 access to this area.  These pigs did not know a moment of discomfort while in my care.  They were warm in the cold weather and cool in the recent hot temps. 

3. Interaction. I loved my pigs.  Loved hanging out, grooming, petting, and playing with them.  On most days I spent a minimum of a hour with the pigs, often times more.  In the winter you could find me in the stall with a spotlight and a book snug as a bug surrounded by three pigs.  I believe their trust in me played an important role in the quality of their meat.  Stressed, anxious, scared, and injured animals will leave tell tale traces in their meat, often the butcher has to cut around or possibly discard the entire carcass.  It can even be unfit for animal consumption.  Before transporting to slaughter I parked the trailer in their field for 4 days.  They were fed and praised in the trailer to limit anxiety during loading and transport.

I believe i'll take the summer off from raising pigs and purchase 3 more near the end of October.  Hopefully the same breeder will have more for sale.  In the future I would love to own a property where my pigs can be raised proper, which to me means on pasture.  Pigs are not intended to live in a confined environment and even though I provided mine with quite a bit of space, the more natural approach is pasture.  I cringe at the commercial pork industry and other homesteaders or small time farmers that stall their pigs.  Raising pigs should not be done without the appropriate amount of space.  There is no pride in keeping these animals behind closed doors.

new website

http://www.highstfarm.com/

getting there.

whole pig $2.50 a lb
half pig $3.00 a lb

priced cuts coming soon.

Chapter 12

The pigs have been slaughtered.

They are truly missed.

The experience was amazing.

John will walk me through the butchers cut sheet.

When they got off the trailer the butcher commented

"those are good looking pigs"

http://www.blueridgemeats.com/

they are going to purchase one at $2.50 a lb